Pinky

(This is very similar to the eulogy I gave in a Zoom recording that was shared during the funeral Mass held on July 14 (Eastern Time) in the Philippines for my sister-in-law, Aurora Singson Lucas, who everyone knows as Pinky.  Pinky is my brother Benjie's wife. She passed away July 10, 2020 (Eastern time) after a valiant fight with cancer)

I am Ondes or Dete as Pinky called me a title given to the second eldest in the family. Benjie, her husband, is my brother.

Benjie and I shared one car when I was working at the Philippine Atomic Energy Commission in Quezon City while he was studying at Ateneo. .  I drove to my office and from there gave the wheels to him that took him to Ateneo.  He was always late in picking me up though.  He was going out with a Paulinian, Pinky,  at that time.  After 7 years, they finally tied the knot in 1980,  lived happily ever after and had a family consisting of Roxanne, Bea (husband Jason) and Benjo (wife Jelly) and a grandchild, Geli.

When Roxanne asked me this morning to give the eulogy,  this quote from Maya Angelou came to mind.

'I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.',

Actually Pinky gets check marks on all three.  The last one is especially true for me.  Pinky made me feel pampered. Spoiled.  With food especially.  Look at all the photos of her creations when I visited the Philippines and stayed at their house in Tonsuya.  

But before I show you the dishes, let me share with you this painting of a scene from the third floor window of their house in Tonsuya. I commissioned her to paint this for me. It featured meticulous details.

I know you are dying to hear about the dishes she made. Here they are.

She made it a point to prepare all my favorite dishes and taught me new twists to them.

She made bulalo complete with corn and all the trimmings.

She just did not prepare baked fish but creatively added cheese to it. 

Her spaghetti was blackened with pusit (squid) juice)  

She also prepared sisig or is this igado.

She served me two kinds of chicken.  Crispy fried chicken the way Lola May our family cook used to make it and chicken inasal which her own cook Baby prepared perfectly.

She also prepared a salad with kamote (sweet potato) tops.

Her sinigang was unique with watermelon added, something she learned from her brother.

She also prepared desserts, including my favorite buko pandan.

She also took me to her family, the Singsons', yearly gathering in Quezon City.

In this food fest, I tasted delectable duck wraps brought by her sister Fea.

One time I savored bruschetta prepared by her niece Charisse.

Other times  my brother would order take out like the awesome spicy crabs from his suki or favorite vendor.

The last visit I had with Pinky and Benjie was in 2018.  As usual during my first day she prepared my favorite dish Kare Kare and was served also Bagnit.  I was in heaven.  I noticed something though, Pinky was in pain clutching her tummy.  She told me she would have a visit with her doctor soon. Despite this condition I had seen her alight from a tricycle which she took to go to the palengke or market just so she could cook her amazing food.

I went home for two reasons:  to take the long awaited road trip with the Lucas Clan, my brother Benie, Pinky and Roxanne, my two sisters, Bebeng and Menchie and husbands Jun and Bubut respectively and my own husband Bob who was flying to join us.  The other was to attend the reunion with my high school classmates at St James Academy.

One night I came home from one of the many out of town activities with my old high school classmates and I noticed Pinky was not around. I was shocked to learn she was in the hospital. I went with my brother Benjie to see her the next day.

The first thing she asked me when she saw me was,  "Dete did you try the Igado I prepared?". This is the dish that Benjie had been boasting to me and all who could hear how well she prepared it.

I was surprised.  Here she was writhing and twisting in pain on the hospital bed and the first thing she thought of was another person, her pampered sister in law, me.

That incident assures me, Pinky is in heaven.  She deserves it.  Her unselfishness, generosity, her big heart, her living the Word, the Gospel is exemplary.  Pinky pray for us up there.  Let God pamper you now.

I want to extend to Benjie, Roxanne, Bea and Jason and daughter Geli, Benjo and Jelly and the Singson family. condolence from all of us. 

My family Bob, my husband, Wendy, Matt, and their children Maddie and Luca.  She hosted them during their visit in 2015.  She also hosted  my other daughter Bettina in 2009.

Our oldest sibling Ate Bebeng and husband Kuya Jun and kids Jona and Ditos, and  his wife Candy and their children Gelo and Trixie.

My brother Chot and Vilma and their child Nina, Chot's children with Minnie Chichos and wife Erica and children Zander and Molly and Minette and husband Lee and their two children Mikki and Kassandra.

My sister Menchie and husband Bubut and their son Christopher and wife Chris and two children Chazzy and Cadence.

My late brother Anton's wife Chet and child with Tipin Gia and husband Austin and their children Dion and Rayshawn and wife Madolyn and their children Rose and Ben.

And your numerous cousins.

 

Lastly Benjie, 

we would like to thank you for marrying Pinky,  She has been a gift to our family.